I am an absolute wreck. I am nauseated and shaky and light-headed. I’m not sick- that’s not the problem. No, I have agreed to play on a sober softball team. And we have two games today. And I have never practiced, let alone played a flipping game. I can’t get these images out of my head: tripping in front of everyone, being frightened of the ball and ducking when it comes at me, or worse trying to catch the ball and failing miserably, attempting to bat and missing it by a mile (and possibly accidentally throwing the bat when I try to swing), and getting so frustrated that I start crying and everyone sees what a loser/wimp/pussy-footed-cry-baby I am. I think I am going to puke. I think I am going to go jump off an overpass and break a few bones so I don’t have to go. Oh my god. This is ridiculous.