survivors
This is a guest post that was submitted to me anonymously. It literally brought me to tears, and I am so glad that I can share it with all of you. I know it will mean a lot to so many women. If you would like to submit a guest post, please email me at karli at momonawire dot com.
There are not many women in my life who have inspired me. My relationship with my mother had been more of a child parenting an adult during my childhood and young adulthood. But there was one woman who reached out to me at the lowest point in my life, a woman who not only literally saved me, but who set my future on a course to do the same for others.
I was the victim of a brutal sexual assault that left me drowning in anxiety, guilt, and feelings of worthlessness. I had no one to reach out to, and in a moment of utter despair and tremendous emotional pain, I decided that not living was preferable to the emotional pain that was slowly eating away at me. I sat down to a bottle of prescription sleeping pills and a fifth of cheap vodka, truly believing that I had no other choice.
I thank God every day that someone found me in time to save me. And I thank God for the smiling face I woke to, the face of a woman who had been where I was, and who was determined to help me save myself. The first thing she said to me was, “You are not alone. You can choose to continue to be his victim, or you can take back your power, and survive this.” Those words struck me so profoundly, that I wept, and she held me tightly and let me pour my grief and pain onto her.
Some years later, in the same professional field as she, I encountered my first rape victim, in the same place emotionally that I had been long ago. My heart was beating wildly, and I was so afraid to talk to her, afraid of the familiarity of her raw wounds. My hands were shaking. I sat next to her on her hospital bed, desperately struggling to keep my own emotions in check. My mind went back to those words that were so simple, yet which had managed to start the healing process for me.
“You are not alone,” I told her. “You can choose to continue to be his victim, or you can take back your power, and survive this.” I know she saw my own ghosts when she looked into my eyes, and that connection, that knowing that someone understood, that healing was possible, no matter how impossible it seemed, was the beginning of that woman’s survival.
That moment, when I knew I had given to her what she needed, which was what I had needed long ago, was the moment that I was able to finally set my ghosts free. Not only had I survived my ordeal and gone on to help others overcome their emotional problems, but I had given to that sexual assault victim the same gift that I had received - hope. Sometimes, that’s what we need the most.
– Anonymous
Wow.
Comment by mama_tulip — March 23, 2006 @ March 23, 2006 at 2:01 pm
I am blown away. That is amazing. I want to help someone that way, someday. Powerful words. Thank you to the woman who shared this story.
Comment by Heather — March 23, 2006 @ March 23, 2006 at 2:02 pm
Thank you, Anonymous, for sharing your story. It’s amazing that you’ve been able to heal and to help others.
Comment by Nancy — March 23, 2006 @ March 23, 2006 at 5:17 pm
Thanks for sharing that story. What a testament to the power of women to pick each other up, to carry one another when the road is rough. It’s amazing to read about the way anonymous carried the torch of empowerment that was passed to her.
Comment by Lauren — March 23, 2006 @ March 23, 2006 at 5:49 pm
I’m with Mama_Tulip: “WOW!” What an incredible testimony for life. Thank you to anonymous.
Comment by Kim — March 23, 2006 @ March 23, 2006 at 6:43 pm
I am speechless. Thank you Anonymous for sharing such a wonderful and profound story. Your strength will speak to so many!
Comment by Queen Beth — March 23, 2006 @ March 23, 2006 at 7:02 pm
What a powerful testimonial! Thanks for posting it.
Comment by Partners in Prayer for our Prodigals — March 24, 2006 @ March 24, 2006 at 7:30 am
Thank You
Comment by Jade — March 24, 2006 @ March 24, 2006 at 8:26 am
What an inspiration to be of help to others through our own tragedies. Thanks for sharing that story, and thanks Anonymous for writing it.
Comment by Kristen — March 24, 2006 @ March 24, 2006 at 10:40 am
Wow. Just wow.
Comment by Mom101 — March 24, 2006 @ March 24, 2006 at 3:06 pm
I know this has been said before, but “wow”. I can only hope that one day I can help someone in a similar way. Thanks for sharing it.
Comment by melissa — March 27, 2006 @ March 27, 2006 at 5:25 am