firm me up
Staying in shape as a mom is a really difficult thing for me. Partially because every day the effort of taking care of two young kids really drains me, but I think the main reason is because it requires doing something that is just for me. Everyone has needs, me included, but everyone else’s needs always seem to take priority over mine. And everyone else usually needs something all at the same time. The cats are meowing because I keep forgetting to refill their food bowl, Zibbit is whining because it’s an hour past her nap time, Babs is asking over and over and over and over to play Shutes and Ladders with me, the phone is ringing and it’s an important call from the insurance company… And that’s on a good day.
When a rare moment of quiet arises I don’t usually jump to accomplish the things on my list that I need to do for myself- although maybe I should. Maybe that’s why I end up going days without showering or taking out my contacts. I know I need to bump myself up on the priority list, but when those hushed moments come all I want to do is be still. While my kids are busy eating lunch I’ll stand at the back door watching the rain come down. If they’re content with an art project at the table, I might lie down in a square of sunlight filtering in through the window. Simple things that allow for nothing more than a chance to hear myself think for a bit. I guess for me, that’s one way of taking care of myself. I need those times to regroup and try to feel like a person again.
We have a membership to the gym down the road, but packing up the kids and depositing them in the gym daycare just so I can work out for an hour always ends up being such an ordeal. Babs is a homebody of the highest degree, and never wants to go anywhere, let alone somewhere that’s not a whole lot of fun for her. It’s always a struggle to get her out the door. Then there’s Zibbit who would rather die a thousand deaths than be strapped into the car seat. It just never seems worth the trouble, and so I never go. I finally went out and bought some of “The Firm” videos, figuring it would be easier to just work out at home during nap time. Which was silly of me, because I know full well that Babs doesn’t take a nap anymore. And she would much rather participate in the workout than watch from the sidelines as I sweat and struggle my way through.
But on the rare occasion that I am able to get through an entire video, I feel so fantastic and accomplished! My body virtually hums with energy. It feels good to have done something so positive for myself. I need to exercise for the health of my body, just like I need those times of quiet solitude for the health of my mind. It’s just a matter of keeping that in mind, and allowing myself to put me first. I don’t think that will ever be an easy thing for me to do, but I know that if I take care of myself it helps me to be a much better wife and mother. My family deserves that from me, and so do I.
Good for you for getting active — not only is it important for your physical health, but I think it’s important for our kids to see us being active, too. My husband and I have an appointment at our local Y this weekend, to see about getting a family membership. Over the years the public school system has been forced to cut back on the physical components of the cirriculim and I feel it’s important for us to be active together, as parents and as a family.
I love the pic!
Comment by mama_tulip — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 4:33 pm
You inspired me to exercise more. I know I need to set a healthy example for my son and show him physical activity is good. I also need to lose a ton of weight! Off to ebay to search for workout videos!
Comment by Rachelle — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 5:59 pm
UGH! I can’t ever find ANY time to exercise. Good for you for getting those tapes! At least it’s doing something.
Comment by Queen Beth — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 7:08 pm
I borrowed “Walk Away the Pounds” from a friend and kept it so long - she asked for it back recently, and now I need to go buy my own copy.
Comment by Liz — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 8:14 pm
I am so proud of you for getting past your obstacles & working that video! Good for you!! I have been struggling with this very thing - something always seems to come up when I’m supposed to be in aquaaerobics. So I just sat down and figured out other times that I could alternatively get exercise. It’s continually trying to succeed that one WILL succeed. Good for you!! ((hugs))
Comment by R — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 8:25 pm
…and you AGAIN inspire me - I went right to amazon.com and ordered my own copy. woot!
Comment by Liz — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 8:42 pm
Hey, I have about a zillion of the old Firm videos!!! I loved the Mix n Match tapes you were supposed to do on alternate days. Also, I SWEAR by them. They work! Now if only I could work up the ambition to do one again.
Comment by Jess — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 9:24 pm
My good friend gave me the firm videos and I love them. Good Luck! I realized that after having two it takes a lot more effort to really get in shape.
Comment by cc — February 23, 2006 @ February 23, 2006 at 10:02 pm
A mom’s life is never easy. I sympathize with you on the gym issue. My kids are homebodies also, and I always feel I spend more time getting them out of the house than I spend at the destination point! My advice? Go anyway. Exercising will not only keep you in shape, but it will also give the kids a great example. Kids seem to pay better attention to their parents actions versus their words.
Comment by melissa — February 24, 2006 @ February 24, 2006 at 6:24 am
Ah, you’ve discovered the magic of exercise-it GIVES you energy! But, getting started is tough, especially when you’re tired. (Here I sit, reading your blog…I was supposed to be at the gym an hour ago!)
Comment by Mom — February 24, 2006 @ February 24, 2006 at 6:51 am
I work out every morning while my 3 year old runs circles around me (or pouts in the chair) and the baby plays on the floor. It took us a few weeks of me gently teaching them that exercise was important and I was going to do it every day, but now it’s part of the routine. Sometimes I have to stop early, and sometimes I’m doing the cool down holding one or the other, but they finally get it I think.
How do you like The Firm? I was looking at them on Amazon, but haven’t made a commitment yet. I’ve got 2 or 3 of Leslie Sanson’s “Walk Away the Pounds” and have been doing those, but need some VARIETY!
Comment by Bethany — February 24, 2006 @ February 24, 2006 at 6:10 pm
I wonder if my 2 year old is ready for Pilates… I love that picture of your daughter. I may have to try some of my workout videos (the dust covered, neglected-for-years tapes in the very back of the shelf) during my baby’s morning nap and let the toddler play along. Thanks for the inspiration!
Comment by Staci — February 24, 2006 @ February 24, 2006 at 8:07 pm
I am blessed to have a wonderful mother who watches my girl when I go to the gym twice a week. I often find myself daydreaming in aerobics class about how when I have two children I likely won’t be doing this because my mom won’t be able to look after a baby and a toddler. So much for living in the moment!
Comment by Mama D — February 24, 2006 @ February 24, 2006 at 8:30 pm
You give and give more than anyone. You’ve gotta make time for you. You’ve just gotta! That picture of Babs is so cute. Really well said, Karli.
Comment by Kathryn, the DYM — February 24, 2006 @ February 24, 2006 at 9:11 pm