my pastor’s wife

This guest post was sent to me by a lovely blogging lady who wishes to remain anonymous. I was so touched by her story, and honored that she trusted me with such a personal part of her life. I love that this is a two-sided story: one side a powerful tale of strength in recovering from a devastating disease, and the other side an example of true love and charity reaching out to a woman in need. Please read with open minds and hearts, and remember the bravery it took to put something so private out there for the world to read. If you’d like to write a guest post, please view the guidelines under “what is inspire?” on the sidebar to your right.

If I were to write about someone who has inspired or enriched my life, it would have to be my pastor’s wife, Lisa. I think of all the women in my life, not related to me, she has touched my life the most. It all started 7 years ago when I was her daughter’s boss at work and my family and I had no where to spend Thanksgiving. All of my family was out of town and we had settled in with the idea that Thanksgiving was on our own that year. Her daughter approached me before the holiday and said her parents would like to invite us if we didn’t already have plans. I had only met them briefly once before, but I liked them and we decided to go. They made us feel so welcome and we immediately felt like we belonged. The entire day was filled with laughter, Lisa loving up my kids to death, and the feeling that they truly cared about us.

Now fast forward to 3 years ago. We were searching for a new church to attend. We remembered how kind and loving Lisa and her husband were, so we decided to check out the church they pastored. Just like in their home, they made us feel welcome. We loved the atmosphere and the pastor was dynamic. We had found our church.

About a year later, I was still suffering from depression. Bad depression. I had been suffering for so many years, no medications were working and I was battling the most horrendous demons inside me. I began to drink socially with friends at the time. Then found that the drinking made the demons go away and the depression seemed to lift. Then I began to drink to “relax” after a day with my kids, the kids I watched as daycare and the stresses of being a stay-at-home mom with a husband who worked 16 hours a day. Pretty soon I began to drink earlier in the day and by the time my kids were to be tucked in bed, I was blitzed. Not to mention the parties every weekend. Outside my life, no one knew I drank like this. I kept it a secret. Thus was my routine for 1 ½ years.

One Sunday when I was at church, I was totally convicted of my behavior. I can’t remember what it was, but God was talking to me louder than I had ever heard Him. I practically flew down to the altar at the front of our church and bawled. Lisa was instantly there by my side. She prayed with me. She talked to me. She was there. I then confessed to her my guilty secret. There was no judgment in her eyes. Just love. It was totally Christ’s love I saw in her eyes and I just knew I had to beat this thing that was holding me captive. She told me I was now accountable to her because I had told her. She would pray for me and help keep me on track. I felt assured. I was confident I could do this.

But if you’re an alcoholic, you know all the best promises in the world cannot help you fight your addiction. And I couldn’t stay sober. I would try so hard! But I couldn’t. It got to be so bad, my husband was becoming ashamed of me. When Lisa would call and ask me how I was doing, I would lie to her and say I was doing great. I really wasn’t. Then one weekend, I made the biggest mistake of my life while drunk and I had no where to turn. No where. I didn’t know what to do or where to go. So I called Lisa. I told her I had been lying to her all these months and I cried as I told her what I had done. It was Sunday morning, but instead of going to church, she came right over to my house. She held my hand as I cried. She prayed for me. And she told me what I needed to do. She hugged me. She loved me.

I ended up attempting suicide over my mistake. And as I laid in the hospital recovering, she came to see me. Once again, there was no judgment, no persecution. Just love. Love and concern. She told me there was so much to live for. She knew the desperation I was feeling and she told me that God knew my desperation. And not only that, but God loved me anyway and was ready to take my broken pieces and make them whole again. She told me she was going to be right there by my side as I embarked on my journey. She was my prayer warrior.

I have since made peace with my demons and my life is now whole again, just as she said it would be. But I don’t think I would be where I am today if it wasn’t for her unconditional love and support for me. I have never in my life seen so much of Christ in one person. Lisa personifies what I truly believe is the reason God calls certain people into the ministry. He calls those who can make a difference because they are real. God doesn’t want fake people. He wants Lisas. She’s not perfect and she isn’t mistake-proof. But she loves and she prays. She loved me and she prayed for me. And here I am today. I’ve been sober for 2 years, 8 months, and 15 days today.

To this day, Lisa can tell when I need a hug or when things aren’t right. And when she sees it, she’s right there with encouragement, scripture and arms that seem to engulf you and make you feel like the world does not exist, just you and her. Thank you Lisa for making a difference in this broken woman’s life.

Anonymous

filed under Inspire, Personal Stories
February 17, 2006 at 8:39 am

8 Comments »

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  1. Thank you for sharing these stories. They touch me each time. It is beautiful on so many levels.

    Comment by Rachelle — February 17, 2006 @ February 17, 2006 at 12:38 pm

  2. I’d like to give that woman a hug. What a beautiful portrayal of your struggle. Thank you so much for being honest and sharing it with us. I’m glad that things are better, now.

    Comment by Heather — February 17, 2006 @ February 17, 2006 at 2:11 pm

  3. I love that lady. I wish every day that I could be that kind of an example. This is really inspiring and had me puddling up. Both of you are so awesome. Congratulations on having the courage to confide in her and props to her for listening to the spirit enough to know what help you really needed.

    Comment by Kathryn, the DYM — February 17, 2006 @ February 17, 2006 at 3:10 pm

  4. This is beautiful.

    Comment by Susan — February 17, 2006 @ February 17, 2006 at 5:37 pm

  5. Thanks for bringing us this story, Karli, and thank you to the woman who shared it for your courage in doing so. What an amazing testament to who we can be for each other when we love fully. Rock.

    Comment by Jenna — February 17, 2006 @ February 17, 2006 at 7:52 pm

  6. Wow. This is an amazing story. Thank you for sharing it with us.

    Comment by mama_tulip — February 18, 2006 @ February 18, 2006 at 9:53 am

  7. thank you for sharing these inspirational stories. It’s hard to give unconditional love to someone who has an addiction, especially when you are a family member. Luckily, God brought these two women together.

    Comment by Maria — February 18, 2006 @ February 18, 2006 at 3:08 pm

  8. (I reply as a minister’s wife and as someone who has huge struggles of her own that no one knows about) The best definition of grace that I have ever heard is that it is the divine influence on the heart, reflected in the life. What great grace that Lisa must have received to help her to know how to reach out and not give up on this woman. And what great grace this woman has received, and how she will be able to, in time, reach out to someone else in need.

    Comment by Liz — February 18, 2006 @ February 18, 2006 at 6:09 pm

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